The Bump Got Bigger

Today's hearing went good and frustrating.  The motion to have a new trial was denied (yea!).  However, Birthmom has the right to an appeal and is taking it.  Mr.A went to the hearing today and saw Birthmom, Paternal Gmom, and Paternal GGmom.  Birthmom turned around in her seat (literally turned her whole body) to stare Mr.A down the first 30 minutes.  I miss all the drama.  Gmom apparently has her own attorney as well (although that attorney was not present today).  After the hearing CPS told Mr.A that they were not concerned about the case appeal, but that they would not be able to transfer the case to adoption for 6 months.  Our agency told us they are not concerned at this point either, however in their experience the appeals process often takes longer than 6 months.  So...we wait....again.
Yes, one of my first thoughts was- we've told all of the kids that this is as good as done.  What happens if it's not?  Then, that still, small Voice in the depths of my soul reminded me that I am not nor have I ever been in control of this.  He will protect and guide our hearts, including those of our babies, just as He always has.  I've needed to remind myself of this several times today, and will probably continue to in the coming months.  Do I think we told our children too early?  No.  I know that there will be many people that won't understand this part (and other parts) of our journey.  I'm also sure that some of these people will be sure they share their very unwelcomed opinion.  But, since this is my blog I get to share mine.  We knew and know full well the things that have/can/could/might happen with any child we take into our homes.  We knew and now know first hand the heartache of losing a child we loved for 9 months.  We also have been amazed at how resilient our boys have been and how open and loving they are to all that enter our home.  So, what am I doing to my children?  I am teaching them to love unconditionally.  To love even knowing it will very likely hurt at some point.  I am teaching them about selflessness.  Wait- actually most of the time they are teaching these things to me.  They are the ones that still ask about PrincessO and talk about their memories of her with great joy at the most random times.  They are the ones that began calling PrincessA their sister long before we knew she would be here even for longer than a month.  They are the ones that seek out their own special toys to give her to make her happy.  I'm so glad God has given me these lessons in the form of 2 pint-sized whirlwinds.

Pray with us!

• Pray that we would keep chugging along as we wait for this process.
• Pray for those making decisions in this case- for wisdom, discernment, and healthy choices for PrincessA.
• That we would continue to remember God is in control and will continue to protect and guide us- that we would be sensitive to His leading and prompting.

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